A letter to the first man to ever break my heart
Dear Mr. Jones,
Man how time flies. I was a couple months pregnant when I last saw you. We couldn't talk much because your big ugly ass baby mama was hawking, but oh how I miss thee. Wait, umm, did I just throw shade on your baby mama? I'm sorry.
Actually I'm not.
That's what you chose.
Instead of me.
Remember?
Remember when we used to talk about building a family together? We were so young and in love. Now look at us, grown ups, parents... miserable.
Remember when you broke my heart?
No?
Oh you're right, it happened a few times. I was always one to give a second, third, fourth chance. I remember when you first told me about this girl. It was impromptu. She was outside of your apartment, she was kicking dents into your back door, she was throwing bricks through your car windows... you were breaking my heart.
Before then? I vaguely remember our conversation. You said you were going out with G, having drinks, celebrating life. So you went out, you got drunk. I was away at school, my cousin Von called, asked me if I was sitting... down... told me you were in an accident. You flew through the front window. You were in a coma.
I remember running out of Business History class the next day, hyperventilating, crying hysterically, thinking of you. It broke my heart that I couldn't be there with you, helping you recover.
Before then? You left for the military, you sent me a letter while you were there, it was so perfectly written. You addressed it to Ashley McCall because you couldn't spell my first name. You never had to. I would hold those little papers, run my finger over the military stamp engraved, read that letter over and over again. Reaching the end just broke my heart.
I could go on, Mr. Jones, about how you broke my heart but in actuality, you have just made me realize that either I hold too many grudges or I give too many chances. Either way I still have not and will not forgive you, the first man to ever break my heart.
Man how time flies. I was a couple months pregnant when I last saw you. We couldn't talk much because your big ugly ass baby mama was hawking, but oh how I miss thee. Wait, umm, did I just throw shade on your baby mama? I'm sorry.
Actually I'm not.That's what you chose.
Instead of me.
Remember?
Remember when we used to talk about building a family together? We were so young and in love. Now look at us, grown ups, parents... miserable.
Remember when you broke my heart?
No?
Oh you're right, it happened a few times. I was always one to give a second, third, fourth chance. I remember when you first told me about this girl. It was impromptu. She was outside of your apartment, she was kicking dents into your back door, she was throwing bricks through your car windows... you were breaking my heart.
Before then? I vaguely remember our conversation. You said you were going out with G, having drinks, celebrating life. So you went out, you got drunk. I was away at school, my cousin Von called, asked me if I was sitting... down... told me you were in an accident. You flew through the front window. You were in a coma.
I remember running out of Business History class the next day, hyperventilating, crying hysterically, thinking of you. It broke my heart that I couldn't be there with you, helping you recover.
Before then? You left for the military, you sent me a letter while you were there, it was so perfectly written. You addressed it to Ashley McCall because you couldn't spell my first name. You never had to. I would hold those little papers, run my finger over the military stamp engraved, read that letter over and over again. Reaching the end just broke my heart.
I could go on, Mr. Jones, about how you broke my heart but in actuality, you have just made me realize that either I hold too many grudges or I give too many chances. Either way I still have not and will not forgive you, the first man to ever break my heart.
Comments
Sometimes it takes us once to learn from it, and sometimes multiple... but like they say "what doesn't kill us makes us stronger" and that is indeed the truth :)