Because I said so

If I were on Maury, today's show would be entitled: "The women who hold men down and the men who don't deserve it." I swear being a down ass chick gets you no where if the man doesn't love you. Now you're just down for no damn reason, struggling for air, with no one to pull you up. If I were on Love and Hip Hop of Atlanta, my character would be the random woman who slapped some sense into MiMi Faust. She really really needs it Lord. Let me help her, please. If I were on Top Chef, I would be the only "chef" using the microwave. Hey man, I'm just now learning how to do the cooking thing, give me a break. If I were on Jeopardy, I would play like I'm clicking the shit outta that buzzer then lie and say it didn't work. If I were on La La's Full Court Life I would have to tell Po that her wardrobe is a montronsity and if she ditched the rags she would look much more attractive. If I were on Bad Girls Club I would be sent home the...

I know the good Lord will strike me down for saying this, but I love the new season of Love & Hip Hop Atlanta. There are many many reasons why I should not but the reason why I do far exceeds any social standard or racial disgrace. I love it simply because I can relate. Not many of you know this but I have an seriously dysfunctional relationship with my child's father. It is so bad that we can not stand to live in the same state because all we do is fuss and fight. We hate each other immensely but we have a child together so we are forced to interact from time to time. He started off as a bad boyfriend that I should have deaded in the beginning but you know how those bad boys are so he turned into my bad baby daddy, and now here we are. Now this is the clean version but chop it up and screw it round and you have Stevie J and MiMi. If that relationship ain't a dirty mirror image of us, my name ain't what it is. Now for those of you who know me, the ONLY difference...