Retail Weirdness vol.4 : Against Policy
Against Policy: Why people sleep with their boss
In lieu of the David Letterman extortion case it has came to my attention that some things never change: Young women sleep with older men. But what I never could understand until I worked in the wonderful world of retail is how young women sleep with older men... in the workplace. And if that isn't bad enough, those older men are their superiors. It is a plus if this man has power, if this man has money, if this man has anything that you don't have. The only thing that may be common is ambition. Being with an older man can give power. It makes you feel wanted. It makes you feel like he is taking a risk for you.
Off the top, 90% of people would say the younger, low on the totem pole, female wants to move up, she wants power and she wants it the sleazy, i mean easy way. 10% would want to argue that the woman just fell in love with the wrong person, they would probably say you can't help who you love and the more you work with someone, the closer you become, making it easy to fall into a relationship. This is all true, both aspects, but how do you judge them? Why bother judging them? Once the situation is noticed, someone is getting fired, sued, embarrassed, divorced or all of the above.
Being with your superior can give you power, especially in the workplace. Long lunch, sure!
Being with a married man can give you power, the power to love and leave, with no strings attached.
But being caught, that will leave you weak, job less, love less, powerless.
Which hurts more, the buildup or the downfall?
Sure everyone would say the downfall but just picture the buildup for a second...
Everything is great, you're sipping a Mai Tai, your favorite drink at your favorite resturant, sitting across from your favorite person. The night couldn't be any better. Well that is until his wife calls and he has to step away from the table. You are cheating yourself out of a fair chance at love. You are getting duped by the aspect of everlasting love with someone else's husband. You are settling for less when you can put all your attention, dedication and love into someone who can return those exact same things.
Peep the retail play by play:
The Interview
He doesn't interview you, another person does but he peeks in periodically to see if you need coffee. He assigns someone to give you a tour, he seems very nice.
Your First Day
Everything is very professional. You barely see him. He's so busy, he's so important, so mysterious.
You're getting a Raise
Wow only a month on the job and you're already getting a raise. It must have been those "late nights" at the office. The yearly mark people are jealous, they start to spread rumors.
Termination Day
I mean face it, all good things must come to an end. Word gets out fast. He doesn't get fired but you do. He's an asset, you are not. He doesn't try to save you, he has to save himself, his image, his reputation, his marriage. This is the first time you have felt pain, everything else felt so good.
So which hurt more?
Of course in the David Letterman case it went a little different but it also went with multiple women. How do you not think you're going to get caught being sloppy like that? My advice to women trying to move up the corporate ladder is STOP! You are getting it the wrong way, never has putting yourself at risk sounded so appealing but ends so badly. And if you're not trying to move up the ladder, you just happen to be in love with the wrong person, my advice is STOP! You will have, can and will love again, move along. There needs to be more people looking at the severity of this case. Yes it happens with men dating older women in higher positions but it is rare mainly because women tend to take statuses very seriously so if she makes more money than he does, he probably won't have a chance.
Men on the other hand love a fresh young tender, so it is up to the women to be strong, be selective and be smart. Before accepting that job, peep the scene, read the fine print because your future job description might just be against policy.
In lieu of the David Letterman extortion case it has came to my attention that some things never change: Young women sleep with older men. But what I never could understand until I worked in the wonderful world of retail is how young women sleep with older men... in the workplace. And if that isn't bad enough, those older men are their superiors. It is a plus if this man has power, if this man has money, if this man has anything that you don't have. The only thing that may be common is ambition. Being with an older man can give power. It makes you feel wanted. It makes you feel like he is taking a risk for you.
Off the top, 90% of people would say the younger, low on the totem pole, female wants to move up, she wants power and she wants it the sleazy, i mean easy way. 10% would want to argue that the woman just fell in love with the wrong person, they would probably say you can't help who you love and the more you work with someone, the closer you become, making it easy to fall into a relationship. This is all true, both aspects, but how do you judge them? Why bother judging them? Once the situation is noticed, someone is getting fired, sued, embarrassed, divorced or all of the above.
Being with your superior can give you power, especially in the workplace. Long lunch, sure!
Being with a married man can give you power, the power to love and leave, with no strings attached.
But being caught, that will leave you weak, job less, love less, powerless.
Which hurts more, the buildup or the downfall?
Sure everyone would say the downfall but just picture the buildup for a second...
Everything is great, you're sipping a Mai Tai, your favorite drink at your favorite resturant, sitting across from your favorite person. The night couldn't be any better. Well that is until his wife calls and he has to step away from the table. You are cheating yourself out of a fair chance at love. You are getting duped by the aspect of everlasting love with someone else's husband. You are settling for less when you can put all your attention, dedication and love into someone who can return those exact same things.
Peep the retail play by play:
The Interview
He doesn't interview you, another person does but he peeks in periodically to see if you need coffee. He assigns someone to give you a tour, he seems very nice.
Your First Day
Everything is very professional. You barely see him. He's so busy, he's so important, so mysterious.
You're getting a Raise
Wow only a month on the job and you're already getting a raise. It must have been those "late nights" at the office. The yearly mark people are jealous, they start to spread rumors.
Termination Day
I mean face it, all good things must come to an end. Word gets out fast. He doesn't get fired but you do. He's an asset, you are not. He doesn't try to save you, he has to save himself, his image, his reputation, his marriage. This is the first time you have felt pain, everything else felt so good.
So which hurt more?
Of course in the David Letterman case it went a little different but it also went with multiple women. How do you not think you're going to get caught being sloppy like that? My advice to women trying to move up the corporate ladder is STOP! You are getting it the wrong way, never has putting yourself at risk sounded so appealing but ends so badly. And if you're not trying to move up the ladder, you just happen to be in love with the wrong person, my advice is STOP! You will have, can and will love again, move along. There needs to be more people looking at the severity of this case. Yes it happens with men dating older women in higher positions but it is rare mainly because women tend to take statuses very seriously so if she makes more money than he does, he probably won't have a chance.
Men on the other hand love a fresh young tender, so it is up to the women to be strong, be selective and be smart. Before accepting that job, peep the scene, read the fine print because your future job description might just be against policy.
Comments
Which hurts more, the buildup or the downfall? I think the downfall hurts more, cause it offers perspective that a buildup doesn't. The Buildup becomes anything your mental contemplates. The Downfall, well, it's blunt reality.
Don thank you oh so much. I was really feeling this one as well. I know a lot of people think the downfall is worse but I think the opposite for the same reasons you oppose.
The blunt reality can be understood but when you are in the pudding you think everything is going to work out fine. You are so enthralled in nonsense that you confuse all knowledge of what is right. The buildup is where you loose yourself.