Misconception

This week I learned that I am not all what I am cracked up to be.
Someone from my past, hurt me so bad and he only told me his perception of good news.
I thought I was one thing, until he showed me I was another.
I thought I was strong, I could handle, I could manage.
He showed me I was weak, I could break, I could stumble.
But why? Why when a person from your past moves on without you, you feel down?
Why can't we be happy for that person?
After all isn't this what we wanted?
Didn't we push him away in the first place?
Didn't we want him to move on?

Maybe with his life, but not with his love, right? He can't love me, her and their unborn. He has to let someone go, he has to let me go... but why? I thought I was one thing to him, until he showed me I was just another ex.
I thought I was stronger than him. I thought I could handle him getting into a relationship with someone else. I mean I was in other relationships.
I thought I could manage without his love.
He showed me otherwise with just one text. One word out of the text actually:

Kid.

I was supposed to have his kid... once upon a time. But why am I trippin? I mean I'm not really trippin on that because I'm not ready to have a child. Furthermore I'm already in a relationship.
I guess I thought no one could live without me.
At least that's how my other ex boyfriends make me feel.
But this one is different.
He sure showed me.
That I am not all, what I am cracked up to be.

Comments

Geri A. said…
It's kinda scary how when i read your blog, i can hear my voice saying these exact same words... SMH I donno if its a good thing or a bad thing, but im glad that i'm not the only one who feels this way.

The turmoil our emotions go through....
February 5, 2011 at 11:46 PM
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